29!


I know, I should've written this before, but I've been quite busy trying to catch up with work, friends, fam, dogs, chores, gigs etc. after two consecutive long trips abroad. The -ber months are here and I am SO excited! (Lol as always, when am I never excited? 🤷🏻‍♀️) The truth is I like celebrating my birthday just because after it, I go on full Christmas mode. Christmas is in the playlist, I ask for the Christmas tree to be brought out, and I check if I have gifts for everyone already. (I am trying VERY hard not to put on exclamation points and lots of emojis in here.)

So, 29. *Cuss*. 29.

Who would've thought I only have one full year before I turn dirty. Oh sorry, thirty (ha!). Anyway, I only got 30 minutes to write this so I'm sorry if there typos, grammar issues, and a lot of thoughts crammed together. I'll try my best.

Last year, I spent my birthday in Iceland which was totally unbelievable. Loved every bit of it. It was also when I turned 28 that I felt like something closed.

And now at 29, I know I'm prepping up for a new decade. Not sure, but I think in my 20's, I've observed how change come—in waves. A small one, a hint, being pushed by the wind, rolling into another small wave until it becomes larger and larger and hits the shore. At 28, I think a large wave finally hit shore. At 29, I can feel one hinting. (Jeepers, so serious.)

I spent the eve of my birthday with my best friends—two, one-of-a-kind girls who put balance to my good world (not that they're bad, just loca). (And as I've said before, I'm not as goody goody as I look—just ask them). Of course I planned it. If it's the last year of my twenties then it sure should feel like the youngest I'll ever be. (But I'm not gonna write it on Thought Catalog this time haha.)

We booked a hotel room for the night, being that we don't like crowded, noisy places anymore (or from the start?), and there's no time nor reason to dress up, plus we have a baby girl who we dearly love with us (in another room). It started with bottles of mule, then gin mixed with sweetened probiotic milk (hihi), then shots of a Korean soju (which is a total traitor). We didn't feel like it was enough so we bought a nasty, cheap-ass, yup, you got it—tequila. The motherchucker sent us straight to crazy happyland right away. The living room turned into a dance floor and we (chicken) danced our night out. (I wish I could show you the videos but I'm sworn to secrecy.)

Of course I got a lecture about dating and love life somewhere in the middle.

"You're 29!!! When are you going to get kissed*?"

Ugh, fckr. Same question every fckn year. To which I reply,

"When are YOU guys gonna get married?"

You know how girls get into detail of the "issues" and we just end up all silent, warmed by alcohol, all cuddled up, comforting each other that we're gonna be okay and we'll figure it out? That was us.

At midnight they sang me a happy birthday (with my now new favorite cake) which completely surprised me and to which I tearfully and slurringly said "Shank you guysh." I've always been the person who plans and does things for other people, so when I get good surprises, not necessarily gifts, I just 😭. (So grateful for the pasta for dinner and breakfast spread prepared for me 😭)

I barfed afterwards. 🙌🏼 But I managed to brush my teeth, wash my face, and change into my PJ's before I sleep. I didn't cry either. (The very first time I got drunk at 22, I cried and laughed alternately which now they expect me to do every time I get drunk 🤷🏻‍♀️—this is only the fifth time, c'mon I'm a good girl. 😉)


The next morning, I woke up in a still-spinning world with the other one who didn't get hungover sliding off drapes, taking our comforter out, and yelling "BREAKFAST TIME!!!" at us.

The chicken cheese hotdog, corned beef and garlic rice would've been so delicious if not for my dead taste buds and appetite. Apparently I still had soju and tequila to barf out. I smiled at my reflection by the sink and told her, "You asked for it." I did. I thought my intestine was going out too. I slept for another round and it did magic.

Woke up take 2, I felt like I turned 29! I felt like I woke up a different person. For the first time, I felt so sure of who I am. That I'm like this person, who tried her best figuring out who she is all her 20's and then BAM29 and she's ready for so many new things.

I don't know exactly what will happen this year, but I'm grateful to be here and excited for new adventures, as always!

Challenging myself with 12 things before 30; will report next year! 💛

Sorry ma, forgot to wear pants!
*Not on the cheek

Photos by Lola, Anna, and Darya--thanks so much guys!

Instagram